Splashtown USA
Yesterday, I did what I thought I'd never have time to do this summer, what with the radio interviews for the last two books and all: I took my kids to a waterpark. I usually dread taking kids to amusement parks of any type because they're boring, expensive, and generally involve alot of whining (mine, of course.) But Splashtown USA was a pretty good respite from the heat. I actually had fun on the rides, playing with the kids. The scariest was the Ozarka Falls--a freefall waterslide that, I swear, was so high up, I felt like they should pass out oxygen tanks or at the very least kleenexes for our nose bleeds. My two youngest ones went first. I was alittle worried because they didn't seem to listen to my frantic pleas that they remember to cross their legss and the ankle and cross their arms across their chests, so I envisioned them coming through the experience with arms and legs flopping loosely at odd angles. After they went, there seemed to be an unsettling pause before they gave the signal for the next person to go. That didn't help allay my anxiety one bit. So here I am, perched on the top of a monstruous fiberglass cliff, arms crossed more in benediction than safety. I took a look down before my plummet and thought, 'GAWD, how could I have let my poor innocent babies go through this?' Then, gravity took it's hold and down I go. My stomach was squeezed up to my throat so hard I knew that it would have oozed out of my ears like toothpaste from a tube if the drop had lasted a second longer. But the horizontal part was the worse. Let's just say I'm not too partial to chlorine enemas and douches. Hmm. Don't dwell too long on that thought, please. Anyway. Moving on. I was happy to see my kids in one piece and shocked that they were begging to go again. It was fun, but it's one of those once in a lifetime funs like parachuting without an emergency chute, climbing Mount Everest without going piggy back on a 250 pound Sherpa, or eating breakfast in Chinatown. So I passed. All in all, the day was a huge success. I'm ready to go again! (But not until I've done some daily Kegel exercises for awhile.)