Fun Weekend
Okay, I've come up with a brand new indicator for how much fun you've had on a weekend--the Newtons of force you have to apply to a crowbar to peel you body and that of other family members out of bed. The force our family had to use was considerable. You see, with went wakeboarding (and tubing and wake skating) on our neighbors new kick ass Nautique boat all day yesterday. We had the whole damn lake to ourselves (probably due to an all points bulletin that Elisa Medhus would be trying a new athletic endeavor within the confines of Montgomery County.) The sun was shining but the breeze made it less brutal. Naturally, I waited until nearly everyone else had tried the wakeboard so I could learn all the skills that I would fail to remember under the duress of panic. The Vazquez family was awesome. Jean-Claude Killeys of the watery world. My 11 year old, Annika, got up without much problems. Lukas didn't even wanna go there. He was content honking the horn, taking lake samples in empty Dr Pepper bottles, and making a nuisance of himself in general. Then came my turn. Okay, first of all, laying on your back in 30 feet of gar infested water with a large piece of plywood strapped semi-permanently to your feet to be used as a potential battering ram against various vulnerable body parts in the midst of a face plank seemed, well, awkward. One of those moments when I wonder what aliens would think of our crazy ass race if they were to observe me in that position. Hesitantly, I gave the thumbs up signal that gives the driver the go ahead to deliver a simultaneous full colonic enema and douche. I heard the roar of the engines which could only portend my certain humiliation. Then came the wall of water. How the heck was I supposed to slide my 50 year old butt across that and stand up? I dunno, it actually happened. Maybe once certain internal body cavities fill up, the weight and balance and bouyancy all reach a critical number. Suddenly, I was upright, the wind blowing in my hair, the lake water draining from my lower intestine, and a smile of false confidence on my face. It didn't last long. I was a flurry of body parts cartwheeling across the water's surface within seconds. Next attempt was better. And the third time I actually touched the wake with one hand like I knew what I was doing. The lake reminded me otherwise. Anyway, I digress. The point is, we were all moaning in our beds come morning, reckoning with stiffness and pain in muscles we didn't even realize we had. It hurt so good, I can't wait to do it again!