Elisa's Journal

You know you're living in 2004 when...

1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.

4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.

6. You go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a business manner.

7. You make phone calls from home, you accidentally dial "9" to get an outside line.

8. You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three
different companies.

10. You learn about your redundancy on the 11 o'clock news.

11. Your boss doesn't have the ability to do your job.

12. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home.

13. Every commercial on television has a website at the bottom of the
screen.

14. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have them first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

15. You get up in the morning and go on-line before getting your coffee.

16. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :)

17. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.

18. Even worse,you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.

19. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

20. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on
this list.

Posted by elisa at 08:06 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Poor Annika, my littlest, is really having a hard time. Lately, we’ve all focused our attention on everyone but her: Michelle with her Biopolar Disorder problems, Lukas and Erik with their homeschooling. There’s little time left over for the kid who’s the easiest one of all. So her world and her place in it seems pretty uncertain now. All the tumult and crises like our miniature pinscher's near death experience, my telling her I have to catch up on my work in the evening when homeschooling takes a huge chunk out of my time, and her being picked on by her older sibs since she's the youngest....it’s too much. She starting to manifest physical symptoms, real and imagined, to express herself. I told her that family is always there to help the ones in need and that she needs to communicate her feelings rather than keep them inside. To heck with work for awhile. I'm taking her on a buddy day and will try to do so once a week. Everyone send maternal/paternal love vibes her way!!

Posted by elisa at 10:57 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

For homeschool PE, Erik, my 14 year old, takes karate classes two hours a week. He also practices daily. No biggie, right? Think again. I tremble with fear watching him attack the kickboxing bag with all the ferocity of an 18 wheeler on steroids. (Better the bag than his siblings, I say.) I tremble in fear as he browses online Karate stores for weapons like sais, ninja death stars and numchucks. (Unless they double as cooking implements are prods to ensure obediance from the other kids, forget it.) I tremble with fear when i see all htat money for lessons and equipment fly with abandon from my wallet. (Oh well, with taking him and others to different lessons, doing my own work and trying to homeschool them all, who the hell has time to spend it anyway?) But I kept reassuring myself with pleasant thoughts like, "Erik will fend off evil nurses bearing colon flushing equipment while I'm languishing away in a nursing home," or "He'll fend off the lascivious advances of Antonio Banderas and George Clooney toward me." (Like that's ever gonna happen. Hey, a girl can dream, can't she? Wait just a damn minute. In case that miracle should arise, I might need some numchucks of my own to keep Erik from butting in.) I do think the sport helps kids focus, find dedication, learn respect, instill integrity and so on. I'll upload pics of him kickin ass.

Posted by elisa at 10:56 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Posted by elisa at 11:51 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Posted by elisa at 11:49 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Posted by elisa at 11:47 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I love my kids. No, I adore them! But I don't think it's possible to love them more than when they're asleep. I mean, how much trouble can they get into cruising through La-La Land. Check out these photos. Annika is sleeping with her buddy, Flicka. The two have been joined at the hip since before she was one. Of course her tail used to be alot fluffier til the dryer got a hold of it. Flicka, that is. Not Annika.

Posted by elisa at 11:36 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Posted by elisa at 02:49 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

When Michelle gets bored, all should tremble in fear. This week, Lukas wandered into her clutches. Unable to resist the pleadings of an older sister, he actually allowed her to highlight his hair. At 11, he didn't have a clue. The result: The Birth of Cheetah Boy. Seriously, he looks like a cheetah from the neck up. Put him in the savannah and he can sneak up on his prey without a hitch. If ony the Clairol Frost and Tip had been his prey, he'd be presentable now.

Posted by elisa at 09:22 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I guess you have to watch what you say in front of kids or at least explain things in back and white. We've been struggling with one of our daughters who has bipolar disorder for the last several years and have explained the condition to the other kids. But yesterday, Annika, my 9 year old, asked me, "What is this Polar Bear Disease, anyway?" She was relieved when I told her that her sister wasn't slowly evolving into a polar bear. (Although sometimes i wonder...)

Posted by elisa at 09:19 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Guess what, guys! My latest two books were among the three winners of the National Parenting Center's Seal of Approval 2004! I suppose I should grovel before my editors and kiss their feet, but I already have scars on my knees from cleaning the kitchen grout with muriatic acid, so...maybe not. You can go to www.tnpc.com to check it out. If you're too lazy or uninspired, here's how the reviews read:

National Parenting Center
Seal of Approval Winners Fall '04

Hearing is Believing
by Elisa Medhus, MD

New World Library
Based on the reviews from our parent testers, there may be no more important parenting book on the market today. Dr. Medhus offers a remarkably insightful guide to parenting. Understanding the power of the words we use when we speak to and around our children should be a clarion call to all parents. How we communicate with our children can and does ultimately define how they see themselves. Dr. Medhus lays out her case with perfect clarity, offering practical advice and a nice blend of humor. The critical lesson here is that so many common phrases that we all use can inadvertently send the wrong message while positive, non-judgmental phrases are both uplifting and powerful.

Raising Everyday Heroes
by Elisa Medhus, MD

Simple and yet wonderfully written, Dr. Medhus does a remarkable job of hooking and holding onto her reader’s attention. The key to her success is that each page is filled with practical strategies for helping children become confident and self-reliant. Testers felt empowered after reading it. They mentioned the author's warmth, wisdom, understanding and humor while giving this book exceptionally high marks. Her well crafted views and recommendations for teaching and motivating today's children to be tomorrow's self reliant adults make this book a must for all parents who wish to be effective in their efforts to raise good, strong and ultimately successful children.

Posted by elisa at 06:11 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Oh the horrific tragedy that has befallen me today! In other words, something realy sucky happened this morning. ALthough I'm not a smoker, I had to buy a carton of cigarettes for someone who's trying to wean off of them. (That's another story right there. Got a decade?) I paid with my credit card and reflexively plunked down my drivers license as ID--to ensure the clerk that I was indeed the cardholder. Plus, it's the best photo I've ever had on a license, so I like to flaunt. I don't look like a cross between Phyllis Diller and Don King. Yippee. SO what did the clerk do? He laughed. I mean belly laughed! And in between the gasps he said, "You're showing me your ID. Ha! That's funny. Look Joe, she showed me her ID! Ma'am, I don't need to see your ID." Gee thanks, asshole. Ya mean my stretch marks, my gray hair, the bags under my eyes, the loose skin flopping under my chin, and the droopy eyelids were clue enough? I'm never looking into another mirror for as long as I live. (Which apparently isn't as long as I thought. Where the hell is my Geritol, dammit!

Posted by elisa at 11:16 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

What's the deal, here? My nine year old has become a worry wart, lately. Any time she can't find one of the dogs right away, she starts hyperventilating and frothing at the mouth with worry, probably envisioning them as the newly installed speed bump on Echo Lane. When she has a tiny bump or cyst, she panics, probably running through operating room scenes in her mind that look more like re-runs of "Trauma 911: Life and Death in the Emergency Room" than reality. Yesterday, we were landing in a plane when she looked at me with great concern, patted my arm knowingly and said, "You know, I never hear the wheels come down and now I did. They sounded really old." Her life is pretty predictable and stress free, other than hearing her older sibs exaggerate god knows what, so I'm not sure what this is coming from. She's a tough little firecracker in al other regards. I can't imagine what she'd do in MY shoes. One day in them and she'd probably wind up curled in the fetal position sucking her thumb and whimpering. I know I do, sometimes.

Posted by elisa at 12:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)